Have you ever experienced burnout from overgiving? I’m sharing my journey of breaking free from the overgiving trap because for years, I was addicted to ‘fixing’ people and just realized it was a trauma response. This secret pattern was fueling my ego, draining my energy, and creating a cycle of exhaustion.
Prefer to watch? I’ve put my video below or if you’re a reader simply continue reading the post.
The Secret Addiction of Being the “Go-To Guy”
I have to be honest, for years I had a secret pattern that was fueling my ego, draining my energy, and creating burnout. I was addicted to being the go-to guy, the one who had all the answers. I felt compelled to solve any problem for my clients, my team, my friends, or my family.
And honestly, I was really good at it. As a naturally amazing problem solver, I thrived in this role. However, the problem was that my entire sense of worth was tied to my ability to fix things for other people. This dependency created a fragile foundation for my self-esteem.
Discovering Overgiving as a Trauma Response
Then I had a profound realization. This constant overgiving was a trauma response, deeply tied to a childhood coping mechanism. There was an old system, a subconscious program, running in my consciousness that was dictating my actions and sense of safety.
This old program said something like, “To be valuable and safe, you must be indispensable to others. If you constantly prove your worth, you won’t be abandoned.”
Honestly, this subconscious drive led to the development of some pretty amazing skillsets. It certainly made me an extremely high performer in my tech and business career. But it came at a high cost. It forced me to carry the weight of everyone else’s success, leaving my own energy completely drained. I would build businesses and scale systems that, by design, relied entirely on me. Does that sound familiar?
My Path to Breaking Free From The Overgiving Trap
The critical shift came when I understood I was conditioning the people around me to rely on me. Instead of empowering them, I was preventing them from learning and growing themselves. My “help” was actually a hindrance to their own expansion.
So, I had to fire myself from the job of being the go-to person. This meant I had to start saying no when asked to do things for people. Instead, I had to step into the role of being a guide. This was a huge shift for me, a step into conscious leadership.
A guide doesn’t carry you up the mountain. A guide shows you the path and encourages you to find your own strength to climb.
Your Invitation to Put the Weight Down
If you’re caught in any kind of an overgiving loop, I want to remind you to give yourself permission to put the weight down. Your energy is precious, and your highest potential is meant to be embodied by you, not given away.
To help anchor this into your energy, take a moment and type in the comments, “I choose to give myself freedom.”
Because your highest potential is meant to be embodied, you are meant to support yourself and others in their expansion. If you are a conscious creator, entrepreneur, coach, healer, or leader ready to break free of these cycles and step into your highest embodied potential, you may want to explore the training I’m sharing. You can check the schedule for the next class to see if it aligns. I’ll see you there on the flip side.
